Part 248: Why The Boring Middle is Actually Exciting

Hello and welcome back to Mortgage Advisor on FIRE.  This week I discuss The Boring Middle.  Also, I celebrate five years without gambling. There are the usual financial updates, and some thoughts around idiots on social media.

Weekly Update

Last Sunday was the first time our new cleaner came to work in our apartment.  She did a good job and is friendly and chill.  We will be employing her again to help take some of the pressure off.  Sometimes you just need a little help to give yourself breathing space, and it’s one of those things that is worth the money.

I had an appointment with a consultant about my pancreas on Tuesday, the result of which is I need another CT scan.  Also, there are some possible issues with my liver which I need to address.  It would be great to get a run of good health going, but that doesn’t seem to be possible.  I have my CT scan this coming Tuesday.

If anyone reading this is good with Macbooks, I could use some help.  I’m having a bit of trouble with the storage on my Mac.  It has just over 200GB, but almost 90GB is being used by “Applications”.  

I don’t have many apps on the device, as I use the Mac almost entirely for browsing, writing, and spreadsheets, and much of that is cloud-based.  I’ve gone into the app menu to check the file size of the ones installed and it doesn’t come anywhere close to the total figure being used.

I had a chat with the tech people online but they couldn’t work it out, so I have an appointment at the store to speak with someone in person.  To save me a trip to the mall and all that entails, I’m hoping someone here can help.  I’ve googled the issue and the solutions people mention to this may as well be written in some form of Elvish for all I can understand.

US Election

A few weeks ago I predicted that one of, or possibly both, Trump or Biden would drop out of the Presidential race.  I was almost right about Trump; the Republican party might be dumb but even they wouldn’t put a corpse up for election.  As for Biden, it’s the right thing to drop out.  The man has given decades of his life to public service.  It’s time for him to rest and spend time with his family.  There’s no shame in getting older.  

It’s going to be interesting to see how the US election turns out.  Trump is still the favourite but the odds appear to be swinging towards Kamala Harris.  My preference is pretty much anyone but Trump.  He’s a special kind of stupid, and that stupidity in combination with the power he could wield as President is a dangerous thing.  I don’t know enough about Kamala to express an opinion.  She comes across well but I don’t know anything about her policies or beliefs.

Global Happiness

The other night Oana and I got talking about happiness.  This was all linked to the concept of “adulting” and how it feels like we have less and less time as we get older.  Back in the day, the typical family had one income, with the other adult being the homemaker.  Now, a typical family requires two incomes and even that is not always enough.  This means that running the household takes a backseat, and people become stressed as chores pile up around them.

So, we started talking about happiness in a general sense and asked the question, “Are people becoming more, or less, happy?”  We agreed that there are different types of happiness and, as a result, it’s a difficult question to answer.  In general terms, people in the UK have more access to shelter, food, information, and entertainment than they did a few decades or centuries ago.  This has come at the expense of other types of happiness, like being able to connect to other people without a device being in the middle.  

Happiness or Contentment?

Another type of happiness is deeper, more fundamental, and is centred on whether people feel content with their overall life.  I suppose you could call this life satisfaction.  An old sci-fi show posed four questions about life to get you thinking about your purpose and happiness; 

What do you want? 

Who are you?

Why are you here?

Where are you going?

If you ask yourself these questions and are not happy with the answers, then it would suggest something needs to change.  It’s difficult to think about these existential questions when you are worried about your next meal or keeping your home warm.  

After googling this, it would seem that the consensus is that in the US and Europe, young people are becoming less happy.  I don’t think this is surprising considering the world is burning, there are complete idiots in power, and it’s difficult for many to afford anything other than basic survival.  

When people talk about depression, many others will assume that depression is the opposite of happiness.  I don’t think it is.  Depression can be the opposite of fulfilment.  I don’t believe we were born with a purpose in mind, i.e. a higher power having a plan for us. 

However, I do think the key to a fulfilled life is to find your purpose and follow where it leads.  It’s a process of discovering who you are, and how you can leave the world a better place than you found it.  Who are you?  What do you want?  Why are you here?  Where are you going?

Online Negativity

I like to believe that people are, in general, good.  However, I only have to spend a few minutes on Facebook to start questioning that belief.  Oana took an extended break from social media; I can’t remember exactly how long but might have been a couple of years (since I wrote this Oana has told me it’s been three years).

Anyway, she recently returned to social media under her new name and it’s allowed her to reconnect with some old friends.  That’s one positive aspect of social media.  The negative aspect can be exemplified by what happened when she posted some pictures of Sheffield and how it’s improving with lots of regeneration going on.  

The group she posted in, Sheffield through a camera, is seemingly full of people who hate Sheffield.  They greet posts with replies such as “dump” and “You haven’t looked around Pitsmoor [an area considered a bit rough and ready] have you?”

The reply that made me chuckle was, “You’ve obviously not travelled much.”  Let’s see, at last count, Oana has travelled to dozens of countries on five continents.  It’s like some people have one setting and it’s angrymad.

I asked this question on the group and didn’t get a coherent response; “Why would you join a group called Sheffield through a camera and then do nothing but bitch about the city?”

Restaurants

On Friday, after finishing work, Oana and I went for a walk about the area and decided to pop into a new restaurant that’s opened.  It’s a spin-off from an Indian restaurant we’ve eaten at once before.  When we entered, one table was occupied, and they’d not had their menus yet (they were handed out later).  

We were shown to our table and then left to wait.  And wait.  Whilst we were waiting, other tables were seated, had their orders taken, and were served drinks.  We were still waiting and so we left.  This was not a massive restaurant; one room with maybe ten tables.  

B’reyt Dough

It was early evening and really nice out so we walked a bit more and decided to try a new pizza place that’s opened in our neighbourhood.  The food was decent.  We ordered a few things to share; a pizza with nduja and salami, a caprese salad, seasoned fries, and garlic bread with cheese.

The food was good and we ate it all.  It just wasn’t memorable or different to any other Neapolitan pizza place.  We ordered a dessert to share, an Oreo tiramisu, and it wasn’t great.  The service was excellent though; friendly, attentive, but not forced.  It felt genuine.  

Finding a restaurant that maintains high standards of quality is so difficult.  I acknowledge that I’m a bit of a food snob, and Oana will admit the same, but we’re not total assholes.  I think our biggest complaint is when places claim to be authentic but are anything but.  For example, we tried an Italian restaurant a few years back that claims to have authentic produce from Italy which forms the heart of their menu.  

This was hard to believe when we saw the staff emptying a large vehicle of Tesco shopping bags filled with ingredients.  We also came down with food poisoning from this restaurant, but that’s a story for another time.

Five Years

This week saw me hit five years since I last gambled.  I’ve mentioned a few times how I struggled with gambling addiction, but I have turned a corner and this is by far the longest I’ve gone without gambling.

When I was at my lowest point with this addiction I knew I needed something different to help break the cycle.  I had given up gambling for months at a time before, but I ended up falling into bad habits.  I had an extra source of support this time, in the form of a podcast from Jamie Salsburg in the US.  He is also a recovering gambling addict and he started The After Gambling Podcast which I smashed through his back catalogue pretty quickly whilst working out.  

I know it has taken a lot of willpower to stay away from gambling this long, but I can’t give Jamie enough credit for his podcast which changed my life.  I had a video call with him a couple of years ago and he’s a great guy with many good ideas about improving the industry and protecting people from harm.  Anyone struggling with this addiction would do well to listen to his content. I’ve linked to his site in the image below:

There wasn’t much time between me stopping gambling and starting my FI journey in earnest.  The two things are definitely linked.  Had I not stopped when I did, I know that my finances would be a mess.  Another point, which is not widely known, is that problem gambling has the highest rate of suicide from behavioural addictions.  Some studies suggest it may have the highest rate of suicide among all addictions.  

The Silent Killer

The problem with gambling is that it can be a silent killer.  If someone has a substance addiction there are normally obvious signs.  Someone struggling with their gambling may seem distracted and stressed, but that doesn’t only point to gambling.  

It might sound dramatic to some but I believe the gambling industry is evil.  The more I find out about it, the more convinced of this I am.  The overwhelming majority of their profits come from vulnerable people with addictions they can’t overcome.  These companies spend a small fortune on making their products as addictive as possible, and the behaviour of their VIP Reps is abhorrent.  

The myriad issues with the gambling industry could fill a book, and so they have in the phenomenal work by Rob Davies, Jackpot: How Gambling Conquered Britain.

If you are reading this and struggle with problem gambling, please feel free to reach out, or speak with a medical professional.  There is help out there and this addiction can be defeated.  There’s no shame in needing a helping hand.  

Diabetes UK Step Challenge

From July 1st until September 30th Diabetes UK are running a step challenge to raise money for their cause.  There are three step targets to choose from; 500k, 1m, or 1.7m.  I’ve gone for the 1.7m target.  It’s a tough target but I’d rather set an ambitious goal.  Also, I have some time off work during those three months to hammer out the steps.

If you’d like to follow my progress or make a donation, it can be done here:

https://step.diabetes.org.uk/fundraising/david4047

Letters to Oana

If you missed it, Part 2 of the series Letters to Oana is now live.

Looking Back

Part 13 of the Looking Back series is also live.

What I’m Doing

Listening: Turning Forty by Mike Gayle.

Watching: Invasion (Apple TV).

Mike Gayle is a cracking author.  His books pack an emotional punch and he can write compelling characters.  Turning Forty came up on the Audible Plus catalogue so I gave it a listen.  It was typical Mike Gayle; funny, emotional, with a great supporting cast of characters, but in a twist his main character was a bit of an entitled asshole.  It made for an interesting story but you were just waiting for the protagonist to get punched in the face.  

We’ve started a new show on Apple TV called Invasion.  It’s about an alien invasion but it doesn’t take the typical route of telling the story.  Instead, it’s following an ensemble cast in different parts of the world as they try to make sense of what’s going on around them.  The first few episodes were slow going, but around episode four it started to pick up.  It’s probably not going to be one of my all-time favourites, but it’s entertaining enough.  

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Financial Update

Assets

Premium Bonds: £14,000.00.

Stocks and Shares ISA: £78,368.10.

Fuck It Fund: £345.97.

Pensions: £79,699.39.

Residential Property Value: £234,044.00. 

BTL Property Value: £151,029.00.

Total Assets: £557,486.46.

Debts

Residential Mortgage: £171,817.53. 

BTL Mortgage: £104,851.17.

Total Debts: £276,668.70.

Total Wealth: £280,817.76.

It doesn’t matter in the big picture but I was a bit annoyed that my pension dipped back below £80k.  It must only be a matter of weeks now until my ISA and pension are comfortably above £80k, which was what I’d hoped to hit by the end of 2024.

BTL Update

The solicitors acting for our buyers seem to be asking more detailed questions than ours did when we bought the property.  It’s frustrating as a seller, but I can’t complain as it’s the sensible way to buy property.  There are some more documents I need to provide and I’m hoping that will be the end of the legal work and we can exchange and complete.  

The Boring Middle: When does it start?  When does it end?

In one of our regular conversations about FI, a good friend of mine posed this question; “When does the boring middle end?”

The Boring Middle is what we call the bulk of the FIRE journey.  It’s the long struggle of investing month in, month out, whilst you accumulate your funds.  The first stage of any FI journey is exciting as it’s new and you’re learning all these strategies and whatnot.  You hit milestones quickly as you see your net wealth double rapidly, as you go from £100-£200, and then £1,000-£2,000.  Later on though, daily gains or losses of £1,000 don’t even register.  It’s amazing how quickly we become desensitised to it.

So, when does the boring middle end?  The key to answering this starts with another question; when does the boring middle start?

I don’t think this is a question that has a single correct answer.  I think much of it is related to mindset.  The best definition I can come up with is that the boring middle starts when you have accumulated enough funds to support one year of living, i.e. your annual cost of living is £24,000 and you have saved £24,000.  It’s arbitrary, but it’s my blog.  

Working out where it ends is trickier though.  As my friend and I discussed this, we were thinking about what the end of the road looks like.  Conventional FI assumes you accumulate 25 times your annual cost of living, and then draw down 4% p/a to support yourself.  You could get to 23 times and have a storming year in the market which then takes you to 27 times what you need for a year.  The flip side of the coin is you could be at 24 times your FI number and then experience a major crash.  

It may be that identifying where the boring middle ends can only happen after the event. 

The Exciting Middle

If we assume that the typical FI journey starts with an Exciting Beginning, followed by a Boring Middle, and then FIRE, it’s difficult to separate the middle from the end.  The end isn’t a phase; it’s, well, the end.  So, I am proposing a new structure;

Start -> Boring Middle -> Exciting Middle -> FIRE

The first phase lasts until you have accumulated a year’s worth of savings.  Then, the boring middle lasts as long as you are contributing more to your investments than what you are gaining through growth.  The exciting middle kicks in as soon as compound growth outstrips what you are investing from your funds.  Finally, you hit FI when you have accumulated the required funds.  

The important thing here is that reframing the same event or process can change how you feel about it.  Rather than getting frustrated at being in the boring middle, we should acknowledge how incredible it is when your investments are compounding at a rate you can’t keep up with.  This is what we are all working towards.  We’re all trying to get that snowball rolling downhill, and when that happens we should celebrate it like the milestone it is.  

Looking at my situation I’m not sure whether I’m in the boring or exciting middle.  I haven’t tracked how much I’ve contributed to my investments, so I don’t know what has come from growth and what has come from my funds.  It might be something I start tracking in future, but I’m going to wait until the BTL is sorted first. 

Final Notes

Thanks for reading, and I hope you have a great week ahead.  If you have any thoughts or opinions on this post, please leave a comment.  Also, please remember to like, share, and subscribe.

Disclaimer

The views and opinions in this blog are my own, and do not represent the views or opinions of my employer, nor should they be considered advice.  

If you want personalised financial advice, seek an appropriate professional.  If you are in financial difficulty, seek advice via the resources below:

StepChange

MoneyHelper

Biolink 

You can now find all my social media pages by checking out my Biolink:

bio.link/davidscothern.