Part 312: The Power to Walk Away

Hello and welcome back to Mortgage Advisor on FIRE. This week, I talk about the power of FU Money.

Weekly Update

I’ve finally managed to hand over my equipment from my last job.  It was way more complicated than it needed to be.  I had a monitor, laptop, and a few peripheral items like a keyboard, headset, and so on.  In previous roles, a courier has been sent with boxes for me to place the equipment in.  The courier then secures the box with cable ties and hands me a receipt.  It’s a pretty simple and efficient system.  

Now we come to this week.  I received an email that stated I had to print some labels off.  I don’t have a printer, though, so  I called my old employer’s IT helpdesk and didn’t really get anywhere.  They said they’d call me back, but they didn’t.  I exchanged emails with my old manager, who advised that I’d receive some boxes to package up the equipment, and then the courier would collect.  This meant I wouldn’t have labels to print, and I’d just be able to download them from the email so the courier could scan them.  I was also told that the collection would be on the 15th.

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that on the 14th, I received an email stating the courier was coming that day to collect the items.  I wasn’t going to be home, so I rescheduled for the 15th, when it was supposed to happen.  When the courier came, I carted down all the stuff just to be told by him he couldn’t take the items as they were.  He also had a box to deliver to me; a cardboard box roughly 60cmx60cm, nowhere near big enough for all the stuff I was handing over.  I refused to take the box.  I had no use for it being the size it was, so why should I?

There was more back and forth with my old employer, but they sorted out someone to come and pick up the equipment on Friday.  It really shouldn’t have been that complicated.

New Opportunities

In terms of new jobs, I was in talks for a job with a different broker, and the package sounded good.  A slightly better basic pay than at my last place, along with a £3k car allowance or company car, plus the usual commission structure.  Now, a couple of things to note about this role: it was fully remote, and would require a site visit “once in a blue moon”.  When I was doing my own research on the role and the company, I noted that under the “must haves” was the requirement for a driving licence.  

I don’t drive and have absolutely zero desire to drive, and so I queried this and was told that it wouldn’t be a deal breaker, but I would not be eligible for the car allowance.  So, because I don’t drive, a remote role would cut my pay by £3k.  Make that make sense.  I would understand if travel was a must for the job, but this was a major red flag.  The employer said that the car allowance could only be paid to those with a driving licence, and my reply was that if there was no driving needed for the job, why would those who have chosen not to drive be penalised with a £3k drop in pay?  It makes no sense, and so I withdrew from the process.

Anyone getting a car allowance from a job benefits from that allowance in ways above and beyond their normal duties.  So it makes no sense for someone who can still do the job to be paid less just because they have chosen not to drive.  If the site visits were as suggested, very infrequent and within your local area, then I’d be fine just sorting an Uber out for those visits.  A completely bizarre situation.

On a more positive note, I’ve been talking with another company about working with them.  I’ve had two positive calls with their people so far, and I have a formal discussion with them this coming week.  This would be for a self-employed role within their network, which means leads and admin would be supplied, but I would be paid entirely from commission.  I would also be able to set my own hours, which would be great.

Sheffield Wednesday

In the past couple of days, it’s been suggested from several sources that HMRC are about to issue a winding-up order against the club.  Since 2015, Wednesday has been owned by Dejphon Chansiri, and despite a couple of good seasons at the start of his ownership, the subsequent years can best be described as a clusterfuck.  

In the past few months, the club has failed to pay wages on time on five separate occasions.  I could go on at length about all the issues that have come up during Chansiri’s time as owner, but without any exaggeration, that story could fill a book.  It seems that we are entering the final stages of his ownership, but it’s just a question of whether the club will survive.  

This situation could go one of a number of ways.  The club could be sold to a new owner, or the club could be liquidated before a phoenix club is created.  The other possibility is that the club is forcibly removed from Chansiri by the new Independent Football Regulator.  

It’s just insane that it has gotten to this stage.  Sheffield Wednesday are one of the great old clubs in world football.  Established in 1867, Wednesday have such a rich history, and when ranked by competitive honours won, is 14th in England.  As the birthplace of football, Sheffield deserves better.

What I’m Doing

Listening: Record of a Spaceborn Few: Wayfarer Book 3 by Becky Chambers.

Watching: nothing at the moment.

Reading: nothing at the moment.

I’m going to start watching Strange New Worlds season 3 as soon as I find a deal to get Paramount+.  I don’t want to pay full price for another streaming service just for one show.

I’m enjoying the Wayfarer series, but it’s not going to make my list of absolute favourite sci-fi series.  It’s a bit exposition-heavy, and some of the writing is a little clumsy.  It’s been interesting so far, and when I finish book 3, I’ll have just one more in the series to listen to.

Financial Update

Assets

Premium Bonds: £23,000.00.

Stocks and Shares ISA: £122,303.29.

Fuck It Fund: £0.00.

Pensions: £106,223.97.

Residential Property Value: £239,368.00. 

Total Assets: £490,895.26.

Debts

Residential Mortgage: £175,838.74. 

Total Debts: £175,838.74.

Total Wealth: £315,056.52.

I had my annual pension statement from Lloyds.  I was expecting to see a projected fund value at retirement of roughly half a million.  This is based on a growth rate of 6%.  I was surprised to see a projected fund value of only a quarter of a million.  Some quick calculations suggest they’ve used a projected growth rate of 3.5%.  In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter; the rate of growth will be what it will be.  I was just surprised to see such a low growth rate being used.  

Once my final salary has been paid from my last job, I will be looking at moving that pension pot elsewhere.  It’s currently held with Aviva, but I’d rather lump it in with my current SIPP provider for ease of administration.  

The Power to Walk Away

Something that’s been on my mind recently is how different it feels to be able to say no. I don’t mean the kind of polite “thanks but no thanks” that you give when someone offers you a biscuit after you’ve already had two. I mean the kind of “no” that comes with weight; the one that means, I don’t need to do this just to survive.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve had a few job discussions that, a few years ago, I’d probably have bent myself into knots trying to make work. I’d have convinced myself to overlook the red flags, the vague promises, the unclear pay structures, the “we’ll sort that later” conversations. Back then, the thought of not having a steady salary coming in would have terrified me. Like many people, I equated employment with safety, even when that “safety” came at the expense of peace of mind.

But this time was different. I’ve been able to look at roles and think, no, that doesn’t make sense for me. Not because I don’t need to work, I do, but because I’ve built enough behind me to have choices. That’s what money really buys: options.

When I withdrew from that remote job that would have penalised me £3,000 a year just because I don’t drive, it wasn’t out of anger. It was out of clarity. A few years ago, I’d have tried to justify it: “Maybe it’s still a decent deal,” “maybe I can overlook that.” But when you have assets and savings behind you, you stop looking at every opportunity through the lens of need. You start looking through the lens of fit.

There’s a quiet confidence that comes from knowing you’re not negotiating from a place of desperation. When you’re living payslip to payslip, you’re at the mercy of whatever’s offered. You might know it’s unfair, but your options feel limited. Once you have that financial cushion with money in Premium Bonds, an ISA, and a pension pot ticking along, the conversation shifts. You can afford to wait. You can afford to insist on fair treatment. In short, you can afford to walk away.

It’s one of the most under-appreciated aspects of financial independence, and it’s one that doesn’t require reaching full FIRE status. You don’t need millions in investments to feel that shift. You just need enough breathing space to give yourself time; time to make decisions carefully, to wait for the right opportunity, and to avoid compromising your values out of panic.

Money doesn’t solve everything, but it changes the power dynamic. It lets you take your time instead of taking whatever’s going. It gives you the headspace to assess whether something aligns with your life, not just your bank balance.  A lot of people have to come to me for advice on their finances and careers.  These people will be sick of me repeating a particular sentiment over and over in response to their complaints; “the world of employment is not fair, and you need to understand that.”

When I think back to my twenties, I remember how trapped I often felt. A bad week at work felt catastrophic because I couldn’t afford to quit. I had debts, rent, and no savings. If I’d walked away from a job then, I’d have been walking straight into a wall of financial stress. Now, the situation is entirely different. I could go a few months without income and be fine. Not comfortable forever, but fine. That kind of stability is liberating in ways I didn’t understand until I experienced it.

It’s not about being reckless or arrogant; it’s quite the opposite. The power to walk away makes you more discerning. You stop chasing every shiny opportunity. You stop saying yes just because you’re flattered to be asked. It lets you take a step back and think, “Does this actually work for me?” And more often than not, the answer is clearer than you expect.

For years, I thought financial independence was about retiring early. That was the headline goal, and the big FIRE acronym. But the longer I’ve been on this path, the more I’ve realised that the real magic happens long before the finish line. The small milestones like paying off debt, hitting your first £10k, or building up an emergency fund; each one quietly shifts the balance of power. You don’t always notice it happening. It’s only when you face a decision like I did recently that you realise: I can choose.

That’s the moment FIRE stops being theoretical. It’s no longer numbers on a spreadsheet; it’s confidence in action.

There’s also something deeply emotional about it. It’s not just about money; it’s about dignity. Being able to walk away from something unfair, such as a toxic workplace, a poor offer, or a culture that doesn’t value you.  It’s all a form of self-respect. You’re no longer trapped in the cycle of taking what you can get. You’re choosing what you deserve.

I sometimes think back to colleagues I’ve seen over the years who clearly weren’t happy but felt stuck. I’ve been that person too, waiting out the clock, counting holidays, convincing myself that things might get better if I just worked harder. The financial system, the mortgage industry included, often preys on that dependency. Salaries are structured just tightly enough to keep you hooked, and bonuses are dangled like carrots. The result is that a lot of good people stay in bad situations simply because they can’t afford not to.

That’s why saving and investing isn’t just about numbers; it’s about power. Quiet, understated power.  The kind that doesn’t shout, but simply gives you the freedom to make better choices.

I think a lot about the concept of FU Money: the idea that you’ve saved enough to walk away from any situation that compromises your integrity. It’s a blunt phrase, but there’s truth in it. For me, it’s less about telling anyone off and more about being able to say, “No, that doesn’t work for me,” without fear. That kind of peace of mind is priceless.  I remember a while back when Oana was having issues in a previous job.  This was another “work isn’t fair” situation, and her employer emailed her with a threat; “you should think about your position here.”  Well, we spoke about it and I told Oana she could quit (not in the sense I was telling her what to do, but in the sense we’d be ok if she did).  I suggested phrasing her reply as:

“As suggested, I’ve thought about my position.  I quit.”

The response from them was hilarious as they clearly didn’t expect that sort of action.  This is what FU Money gives you: the power to choose.

It’s funny how financial independence reshapes your sense of risk, too. When you have a cushion, risk becomes something you can approach rationally instead of emotionally. You stop worrying about every dip in the market or every what-if scenario. You start thinking strategically, not just about how to make more money, but how to make better use of the time and security you already have.

That’s what I’m leaning into right now. I’m not in a rush to jump into the next thing. I want to make sure that whatever comes next aligns with what I value: work that feels meaningful, fair, and flexible. If that takes a few extra weeks or months, so be it. I’ve worked hard to earn the luxury of patience.

And maybe that’s the real endgame of financial independence. Not early retirement, but peace. The quiet knowledge that your future isn’t hanging by a thread, that you can make decisions based on what’s right instead of what’s urgent.

If you’d told me ten years ago that I’d be able to turn down a job because it didn’t feel right, I’d have laughed. Back then, I said yes to everything because I didn’t feel like I had a choice. Now I know better.

The power to walk away isn’t about arrogance. It’s about alignment. It’s about making sure your time, energy, and effort are spent in places that value you. Most importantly, it’s about building a life where you can stand your ground without the ground shaking beneath you.

That’s what all those years of saving, budgeting, and investing have really been about. Not just freedom from work, but freedom within work and the ability to look someone in the eye and say, calmly and confidently, “No, thank you.”

DISCLAIMER

The views and opinions in this blog are my own, and do not represent the views or opinions of my former, current, or future employers, nor should they be considered advice.

If you want personalised financial advice, seek an appropriate professional.  If you are in financial difficulty, seek advice via the resources below:

StepChange

MoneyHelper

Biolink 

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